4 Out of 33: Revisit the Vision Board

Last year I was focusing on balance and part of one of my challenges was coming up with a vision board .  I hung it in my living room and lately I've been staring at it a bit bothered by the blank spaces.  I decided to revisit it and add to the board.  It looks less uniform now which is actually more my style, but what surprised me wasn't the aesthetics as much as what I was adding to the board.

When I created the vision board I was filling it with quotes about self esteem and body image because that is what I was occupied with last year.  Not that those aren't things that I still struggle with, but I found myself gravitating to other things.  When I finished the board I realized I was adding quotes about inspiration and motivation.  I think that is because I want to be seen as someone who is inspiring and motivating, but also in thinking about open doors I want to be open to inspiration coming from unexpected places.

 I also found myself adding more images this time around. They were mostly faces of women, not any famous women, but depictions of the type of women from other eras that I admire: flappers, 19th century stage actresses, free spirits of the Flower Power days.  These are women who enjoyed life, weren't dragged down by inhibitions or social norms, and didn't let romantic relationships dictate their life.  I'm not surprised I added these images.  This sounds cheesy, but lately I've been thinking about the scene from my favorite Disney (I know right?) cartoon, Beauty and the Beast where Belle runs out into the field of grandfather dandelions and proclaims, "...and for once it might be grand to have someone understand, I want so much more than they've got planned."  No wonder she was my favorite Disney heroine growing up, I still feel like I've never been in a relationship with a guy who fully got me.  I sympathize Belle.

The other image I added were some butterflies.  I used to be very into butterflies as a kid.  I used to think I was like a caterpillar and someday I'd be something else, something beautiful and confidant.  Another cheesy cartoon obsession from my past was Katy the Caterpillar which was a Japanese film that was dubbed in English.  Katy doesn't fit in with the other caterpillars so she goes off to visit other animals and try and become them, but nothing works until she returns and builds a cocoon.  

I've been thinking about butterflies again, but not really in the body image context.  It is more about metamorphosis to the person I'm supposed to become.  So long story short I want to revisit my board every year.  I want to see where I change and grow each year and what my new priorities become.

7 Out of 32: Healthy Work/Life Balance

One of my goals for this year was to have a better work life balance.  This is something I've always struggled with because I am a bit of a workaholic.  To me true balance is feeling like your able to be giving your all at work, but still having time for the other areas in your life.  Part of being single, I have to admit is allowing myself to say I'm too busy to date, but that is a cop out.  I've never worked at an office where we were so busy that no one had a romantic relationship.  I rarely allow myself to take vacation time.  Since I've been in New York for almost 7 years the only time off I've ever taken has been to visit friends or family during holidays or major life events.

I've decided that 2014 is the year of balance for me.  This means taking care of myself.  I still get to be the worker bee that I am because not being that way wouldn't be natural for me, there are still days where I will put in 15+ hours because it is needed, and I will still do some work on the weekend.  These are all part of my nature.  However what this means in terms of balance is not being afraid to take time off because I know I don't abuse that, disconnecting when I can (spending quality time with friends and not on my email if I don't have to be), trying to take at least one day during the weekend to be off line (that isn't always possible, but on weeks that it is allowing myself to do that).  I think this makes me more productive/pleasant because I won't burn out.

But balance also means focusing on work and your future.  You should never let it go to the wayside.  We should always be growing and developing.  My friend Elissa recently recommend that I read and take the Strength Finder assessment which as Elissa pointed out was quite helpful.  I (like a lot of people) can point out my weakness/shortcomings and whenever I have self assessments that is what I tend to focus on.  This gave me the opportunity to view things from a different lens.  The things that are my strengths aren't things that I would think of.  They are things that I assume everyone else is skilled in, but as my friend Elissa pointed out, not everyone is.  I read it through the lens she suggested which is think of how you communicate.  One of my strengths is Empathy and I honestly assume that most people are empathic, but I am realizing that being able to just read people is a gift that I wasn't aware of. Sometimes whether in work or my personal life I'll think how could someone phrase or do something in front of so and so, don't they know how hurtful that was.  The truth is, no they didn't.  Empathy and the other strengths I have are things I want to really focus on using to the best of my ability.

Milo "helping" with my vision board

The other recent thing I did is create a vision board.  I've heard of this and I'll admit I always thought it was kind of hokey.   But my friend Tina brought the idea of vision boards up a couple weekends ago and it seemed like an interesting exercise.  I had pulled images that spoke to me, but ended up focusing on words and phrase that stuck out to me.  These are things I want to see in my professional and personal life in the future. The one phrase that I put on there several times is "Love Who You Are".  I also happen to have this quote on my current wallet.  It is my reminder that I need to be easier on myself.  Because true balance and the things I want can't be achieved if I don't believe in myself and think that I'm worth it.